Dear Dairy:

I asked Uncle Dick how he enjoyed his time as President under the 25th Amendment Saturday while I was medicated and talking to the hippy. He said it was no big deal; he signed and implemented some minor Executive Orders just for kicks but nothing anybody needs to know about. He said he would’ve pursued more of my official duties but he doesn’t have a bicycle.

Good news, the polyps taken from my colon were benign. I’m hoping to get them back so I can put them under my pillow for the colon polyp fairy. Might make some money on the deal!